Bananapost
Update: June 2004
A lot of people have asked about this recently, so I thought it would be worth mentioning that the 'Bananapost' section here is really just for archive purposes - I don't intend to post any bananas through the post at anytime soon. I've moved onto other 'projects' since, as documented elsewhere on my website!
How to transport your banana safely
This
website does not endorse the sending of bananas through the post unprotected!
For that, we recommend using:
The First Banana
10th April 2002
This
is the first banana that we tried to post on the 10th April 2002.
My colleague Martin poses with the banana - labeled up with two first class stamps - he's sending it to his home address written on the side in biro.
We
walk down Regent Street in search of the nearest post box.
Postbox located. Check that the address is legible and hasn't smudged, and that the stamps are firmly intact.
All
systems go - The banana is primed for posting. Ensuring that we choose
the 'First Class' slot, and not the 'Second class' slot on the post box,
Martin places the banana inside the postbox.
Our
part of the job is done, over to you Consignia - err... I mean, Royal
Mail.
Or whatever you're called this week ...
15th April 2002
We're a little bit disappointed as there's been NO SIGN of the banana in the post at all. We spoke to Martin yesterday who told us -
"I have been patiently awaiting the arrival of my breakfast each morning, but I fear now I will have to go back to the cornflakes".
But personally, I think the postman ate it.
The Second Banana
May 2002
We conceded that the first banana that we sent wasn't ever going to arrive, so we thought we'd try again, but this time actually bother to wrap up the banana in paper first.
Martin
enrols my help in wrapping up the banana. A roll of brown paper, some
sticky tape and my trusty scissors are employed in the task.
It's
not as easy as it looks! I discover that bananas are quite tricky items
to wrap due to their curvature.
To
make sure of it's priority, we scribble the words "First Class"
below the stamps this time - just so that there's no confusion for the
poor old postman.
Another
different tactic this time is that we decide to use a different postbox
to last time - maybe it will make a difference? We sneak out of the back
entrance from work and head to the postbox around the corner.
Martin
makes a final check of the collection times to check that our banana is
going to be collected today. If it's going to turn up in the post for
his breakfast tomorrow then he needs to make sure that it's going to be
picked up today.
And..
the posting! We cross our fingers, shakes hands, wish each other good
luck and deliver the banana into the postbox box slot.
And did we get it back ?
Yes
we did! It was delivered the very next day.
Martin brought it in so that I could take some photos of him opening it up.
Martin
delicately peels back the banana, to make sure he doesn not disturb the
contents inside.
But
the banana is already a bit brown and yukky. Must have got a bit mulched
in the post... but who cares! It turned up! Royal Mail (sorry, Consignia)
delivered it. Nice one!
Banana 3 - Not a banana
21st May 2002 - 'Variety' pack of Rice Krispies
So we've progressed from bananas... Instead we thought up what other breakfast items we could send through the post and hit upon
the idea of a small packet of breakfast cereal.
Martin
uses his Royal Mail cardboard weight machine to see how heavy it is so
we know how muchpostage to stick on.
Hurrah!
It comes under 60 grams. Only one standard first class stamp required.
Martin sticks on a stamp, and writes his address on a sticker on the side.
Yet
again we figured we'd go down to a different postbox, and this time we
went straight to the top - the post box out side the post office on Great
Portland Street. Martin saunters his way down. Rice Krispies in hand.
One
final check of those all important posting times again. Plus we think
that the way Martin stared hard at the postbox last time before putting
the banana in it really helped.
And
in it goes..! Posted.
Yes again, you will of course have to check back here in a couple of days time to see what happened....
It
came back! The very next day... yes indeed, the mini rice-krispies appeared
in the post for Martin's breakfast.
We get a bowl, spoon, milk and sugar in, and Martin eagerly opens the packet...
And
pours on the milk ... rice krispies intact
And
adds on the sugar to complete the tasty breakfast snack.
The Banana Moves
July 2002 - The Banana moves office
A sad occurence in the office of banana post during the summer of 2002. We have to move office, and Martin sadly has to pack the banana away.
We
were all delivered boxes to pack our office posessions into, and with
a tear in his eye Martin lowers the banana into one of the packing cases.
Martin
places it carefully at the bottom of a packing box, but surely ignoring
the advice that you mum used to give you when shopping to 'always pack
delicate good at the top'.
And
thus it was ... packed away, to go to a new environment, a new office.
Could this be the end of BananaPost?
Maybe.
Only time will tell ...
Definetely not a banana
March 2003 - The Chinese Pair
A funny thing happened to me at work today.
I eventually decided that instead of trampling on all the stuff beneath my desk at work everytime I moved my go-go-gadget-like legs, I'd actually get down on my hands and knees and have a bit of a throwout and tidy it all up.
So I get the bin and start rummaging around and throwing stuff out putting stuff in the bin when suddenly I smelt something ... something like ... a banana ... ?
No ! But something similar.
Inside
a brown internal envelope, where it had obviously been placed on my desk
when delivered, and then must have fallen down the back and gone unnoticed
by me for over a month was a pear with a note inside!
It read as follows:
Geoff...
I have read your website and found the comments about posting a banana most thrilling.
Therefore you may like to update your site with how long it takes fruit to arrive via the internal post. This Chinese pair was sent out on the afternoon post, Friday 17th January.
Go, go, go, go pear ...... :-)
So,
to my dear work colleague (whoever you are, although I think I have a
pretty good idea) if you are wondering why your pear did not make it onto
my website for almost 8 weeks, then the reason is because it had fallen
into the quagmire of mess beneath my desk on the floor, and I didn't notice
it - Thank goodness it was nothing important!
23rd
May 2002
Heh heh... Nice. I get home from work today (having been a dirty stop-out the night before, so i haven't been home for a bit), and some smart arse has sent me a banana in the post! Wrapped up in brown paper, heavily sellotaped and sent to my address ...
I unwrapped it, and it would be fair to say that it was a little, umm... soft! I can't but help think that whoever sent it, made sure that when they sent it to me it was already on it's way out... Made me laugh though - thank you to whoever it was that sent it!
28th May 2002
The culprit has been discovered! I got a nice eMail from the person who sent it to me revealing all. It made sense as it was in fact someone who'd recently told me the trick what you can do with a banana to slice it with the skin still on - you use a needle and thread to cut the banana up inside, and it leaves the skin intact. then when the person opens the banana, it all falls apart on them. Clever! But it also made this one very squidgy whilst in transit...
You appear to be sending bananas through the post - are you mad?