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Mile high

Club Mile High“Hello and welcome to flight KY-69, this is your captain speaking.”

“Today we will be flying at exactly five thousand two hundred and eighty feet, for approximately the next 45 minutes – although we appreciate that the flight does not need to be that long for some of you.”

“The stewardess will demonstrate the emergency exit procedure in a moment. Please check with the person sitting next to you before using the rear entrance”

“A protein snack will be served during the intercourse of your flight”

And so it is with Club Mile High, a service I saw advertised yesterday in Charleston where for packages starting at just $250, you get to go mile high and join that not-so-exclusive club that once was. They provide complimentary champagne to get you in the mood, the plane is ‘always disinfected after each use’, and the clean sheets that you get you get to take away with you (!)

I’m up for it. I just worry that one day, I’ll turn on the TV news to hear a report of a Cessna plane in trouble going down, and the bodies of three people were discovered, two of them naked …

13 responses to “Mile high”

  1. Steven says:

    Three people? So is the stewardess also the pilot, or is the deal that you.. er.. “do it” with the stewardess.

  2. geofftech says:

    I was kidding about the stewardess… there’s just the pilot and the two of you. Or three of more of you – depends what you’re into i suppose. and i wonder if this uber-conservative state would have an issue with same-sex couples wanting to pop their cherry at the same time that they pop their ears?

  3. Mikey says:

    That was such a weird post. For most of it, I thought you were telling us what you and Leigh got up to at the weekend 😛

  4. jaz says:

    Well, it can’t be nearly the same experience if it is allowed, for Pete’s sake.

  5. Tina (G's Mum) says:

    I feel I ought to make a comment, I am truly amazed. I am inclined to agree with jaz, if it’s allowed or organised then it’s not naughty any more. I was a child of the 60’s remember so nothing surprises me!

  6. Chucker says:

    Aboard Amtrak it’s called the 8 foot club.

  7. jj says:

    that looks much more comfortable than a bathroom.

  8. Paul Webb says:

    Surely if the ‘plane goes down as well you would have to pay extra.

  9. sam says:

    This could just be me being the paranoid flyer that i am but when you take off and land on a normal plane they make you put your sit in an upright position and i assume there is a reason for this. So when this plane takes off and lands where do you sit if there is just a bed? Or does banging your head on the side of the plane during take off add to the fun?

  10. Mr Spoon says:

    Surely that cant be for real!

    I like the fact part of the advertising is for “romantic dates” I mean thats got to be pushing it surely, asking a girl out on a date and then taking her to the airport for some high altitude lovin! I especially like the fact its “totally private” yet the bed area is separated from the cabin by a curtain! hardly block out sound now do they!

  11. Mikey says:

    #10. Yeah, but in a Cessna you’re more likely to go deaf from the noise of the plane than the lovin in the back.

  12. Wayne says:

    Great idea, though not quite, erm, romantic enough for me…

    Funnily enough from geofftech I went directly to my fave quirky news site, and found this item about another novel use of inflight facilites:

  13. Dan says:

    It would be even worse if the plane went down, three people were killed, two were found naked and you weren’t one of them.

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